Grace: I'm Learning

"The more grace we have, the less we shall think of ourselves, for grace, like light, reveals our impurity."

- Charles Spurgeon

Amazing Grace... that saved a wretch like me...

I once was blind but now I see.

"He must increase, but I must decrease." 

- John 3:30

Sending Your Son, forever blessed

To live my life and die my death...

I broke Your law, You gave me grace

Jesus became my hiding place

Blinded by sin, I hated light

I loved the dark, my soul was night...

Almighty love arrested me

You broke my heart, drove me to grace

Jesus became my hiding place

- My Hiding Place

He lived a perfect life... the perfect life I can never live no matter how ardently I strive. Seeking perfection in daily life whilst ignoring the truth of my utter & unchangeable imperfection is a waste of time, effort, and emotion. Perfection is found solely in the Savior & His grace in my weakness is undeserved. 

undeserved |ˌəndiˈzərvd|adjective : not warranted, merited, or earned 

Going

By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.
[Hebrews 11:8]

There is a time for departure even when there's no certain place to go.
[Tennessee Williams]

And on that note, I'm sending one of two college applications today!

ah. digital post it reminders. genius & even inspirational

Stood out tonight as I browsed my stickie notes:

"We are not made happy by what we acquire but what we appreciate."

Don't Worry Be Happy

Reflect joy. 

[He who scattered Israel will gather him, and will keep him as a shepherd keeps his flock. For the LORD has ransomed Jacob and has redeemed him from hands too strong for him. They shall come and sing aloud on the height of Zion, and they shall be radiant over the goodness of the LORD. - Ps. 34 

Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. -Is. 60]

snippet caught from a radio sermon

"[In the life of a Christian] Peace is not the abscence of war. It is the presence of Christ."

...the only part I heard and that I remember...

From Today's Dose of PSDs

"Let the general [federal] government be reduced to foreign concerns only, and let our afairs be disentangled from those of all other nations, except as to commerce, which the merchants will manage better the more they are left free to manage for themselves, and our general government may be reduced to a very simple organization, and a very unexpensive one-- a few plan duties performed by a few servants." -Jefferson, 1800

What a stark contrast that holds in comparison to the government we live under today.

Murphy & Altrogge

Can you push my glasses up? I'm gonna push em right off your face now sit down and shut up.

She's a dream stealer.

Look at you! You're an idiot!

You seem uptight...

A Tale of Two Cities- What do you think of? Boring

I watched the whole thing through today, with a huge smile on my face and laughter throughout. I've never met either one of them. Watching the videos hits home for me the pain his family and friends must feel; and then I find myself amazed at the even more astounding amount of joy and sustainment by grace in it all by which they move on.

And then I think of all the ways the blog has spoken to me; God's word is living and active.

Pray for Ian.

Listening to Their Stories

I've been thoroughly enjoying WWII documentary videos. Oh the history! Oh the unspeakably neat and irreplaceable quality of hearing of the events that occurred as time passed by from the people whose lives were directly affected. It's refreshing and alive compared to a textbook...

"Mama, Mama...I let him go."

"...for I saw not a great deal of difference between that man’s army and the armies that they were fighting."

"Home was the most wonderful place the world ever contained."

"'Nice girls' don't go to New York City."

"To fight this war, 10 million more of us must go to work before the end of 1943."


The above provides explanation as to why for years upon years my grandma had magazines and newspapers stacked under her coffee table. As they say- waste not want not.

Undecidedness

So. I've been thinking.
Alot about school, but more than that. About life. Specifically what to do with mine. I dont have an answer to the oh-so-popular questions asked by curious family and acquaintances. And as I've realized, there's a more important question: what does God want to do with my life?

I mean, come on. When you've got choices swarming and swamping your brain, choices that are the components to important decisions, how easy it is to take things into your own hands- what do I want to do? what do I like to do? what should I do? what am I able to do? Though there is something to be said about finding what I enjoy spending my time doing and am proficient at, my greatest pleasure, my magnificent obsession should be Christ. Alone. How easy it is to forget that my life is not about me, myself and I. Going to school is about gaining knowledge, but not for myself. It is following God's will for my life so that He can use me! The one who truly trusts God prays; and then prepares the field for the rain that He has prayed for. I desire to be prepared, but I do not want to loose sight and time for the prayer.

It's about Christ. The Gospel. His glory. And since when did I become capable of doing anything worthwhile apart from Him? Since when did my accomplishments, my righteousness, become the exception?

I'm continuing to realize that God has for me a specific purpose and plan. I'm not gonna be the kid who has completed fifteen college courses before I get to college. I'm not going to be a world famous musician. I won't score a 2400 on my SATs. I have this innate desire to never say I can't do something. I can always learn to do it. That principle has served me well, and learning is vital, but it is also 'meaningless.' I've been reading Ecclesiastes :-]

In the end, where does my happiness rest?

What could give me more happiness than knowing that my life has been used to serve someone other than myself?

I have the reassurance through His promises that when I lay my own self down and determine to only build the name up Christ, His name shall be exalted among the nations.

"I am only one. But still I am one. I cannot do everything, but I still can do something; And because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do the something I can do." -H. Keller

I just keep thinking- the choices I'm making now, I make them once and then live out the consequences. I cant make them on my own apart from Him. It's like I'm frozen- I know that God has fore-known what my life holds, how He is going to use me. I dont know what the path looks like, but He does. I'm praying that He guides me. I dont have to see everything; I dont need to walk by sight. But I know that I do need to seek and see His face.

As of last night, I'm going to rejoice in my undecidedness, not downplay it. I pulled out the last edition of the Excelsior and read through it. I didnt have to go far- a front page quote- "Take time to be undecided. It can be thrilling."

Beyond the blessings I have seen and grace that I know now, I will sing of mercies yet untold.

Good Stuff

'But every trial of our faith is but a trial of His faithfulness.'

-Kept for the Master's Use

For if there first be a willing mind, it is accepted according to that which a man hath, and not according to that which a man hath not.
2 Corinthians 8:12