Breakfast Revisited

For those of you homeschoolers who receive the same literary magazine I do and got a copy this week, you may have noticed this post was published... a tweaked and edited version of it.

As a follow-up, I would like to post the following picture:

Now, I have made pancakes since originally writing on the topic and they were pancakes. They weren't bad, weren't fabulous. There was one morning though when I put too much salt, they were nasty, and not even the littlest dude would eat them...

On Christmas morning when I made the pancakes of the photo, well, they were perfect. As I scooted the spatula beneath and flipped them, up, up, splat & sizzle- the motion was smooth as cream. Golden and round and the way pancakes were meant to be; they were good.

I would now like to take this opportunity to say what someone else once said.

“Life is easy to chronicle, but bewildering to practice." E.M. Forster
Those words have not much to do with anything else I've said and making pancakes really is not bewildering. But it's a good quote... at the very least just a spin off from "practice makes perfect."

Star Light Star Bright

Sometimes... you can see really amazing photos by flickr exploring. Today I saw something ca-ute!

I reeeeally like Christmas tree stars. When we went antique shopping earlier this month, tin, paper and aluminum stars caught my eye. The aluminum stars remind me of the aluminum tree along with the color twirlerDad reminisces about having as a kid. They were made to have white lights inserted into them and the light to peek through holes.

So this post celebrates Christmas stars... one of my favorite things!

a photo taken last year of our tree star, a stained glass design

And God made the two great lights—the greater light to rule the day and the lesser light to rule the night—and the stars.
Genesis 1:16

When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars,(I) which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?
Psalm 8:3

...Behold, wise men from the east came to Jerusalem, saying, "Where is he who has been born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him."
Matthew 2

Frozen Strawberries

We pick strawberries every summer, eat them until we're sick of them, and then freeze the rest. During winter nights, we pull out a bag and sprinkle some sugar on top for a special snack. Last night we did just this while watching family movies. There was a lovely fire in the fireplace. It's something we all like and worth documenting I thought!

Smoothies are also enjoyed around here. The latest recipe, incredibly simple yet delish, cranberry juice and strawberries.

As I Wait

I read my email. I perused through google reader then I decided to browse The Rebelution.

...God’s promise is true when He says that everything works together for good for those who love Him and are called by Him — even repeated failure.

Failure is never wasted if we learn to do the following: (1) turn to God and become more reliant on Him, (2) learn from our mistakes, and (3) get back up and try again.

...what she hadn’t done before was to give things up to God. “Funny how we forget that sometimes,” she wrote, “I guess I’ll just wait until my next math test, study harder, and first and formost, give it to God.”

Gracie’s failure was invaluable because through it she learned to depend on God. Doing hard things has made her faith stronger and birthed in her the mindset of an overcomer, and that’s more important than all the success in the world.

When You Fail at Hard Things

I had two tests in pre-calculus before break. The first grade was no different yet no worse then what I've been getting. The second, I haven't seen yet. My "failure" hasn't had drastic consequences or a massive emotional impact on my life. But it hasn't had to. When you study as hard as you know how, ask questions, make the effort to get extra help and still don't get a higher grade, discouragement sets in. Browsing The Rebelution and reading that post helped!

How could I forget this part of the post. I've only felt the exact same way!

This last Saturday I was standing in line to take my SAT World History Subject Test, when a guy behind me started saying, “Yeah, World History is so easy. I didn’t even study for it and I scored 780.”

I wanted to strangle him.

When You Fail at Hard Things

Would you do it?

"It certainly doesn't help the pro-life movement to...participate in this kind of public way in the inauguration for one who holds to a very radical pro-abortion position," he said.

"...the context of this inaugural ceremony would not allow me to accept." -Al Mohler

"Many in the "emerging" and "Emergent church" movements also state their intention to transcend the divisive issues like abortion and homosexuality. Some of these represent the quintessence of cool in cultural identification. But for how long? Eventually, the issue of homosexuality will require a decision. At that point, those churches will find themselves facing a forced decision. Choose ye this day: Will it be the Bible or coolness?"

from an article exploring Rick Warren's invitation
to speak at Obama's inaugural ceremony

[the 3rd quote really has not so much to do with the question, but it stood out]

It's the Holiday Season

It's December 16th and not a single thing have I posted with even a hint of Christmas. We spent a day tree-hunting, pizza-eating and movie star hand-shaking after Thanksgiving. We decorated the tree to classic holiday music while munching on pretzels.

The piano and mantel are festooned and topped with beautiful decorations. All the musical ones and Christmasy carolers are on the piano of course! I'm so glad I bought the SGM Volume 3 song book. It contains the Savior CD songs, some of which I've been playing for a week or so now. A bright red, green and gold table clothe adorns the dining room table and it cheers me up each time I sit down and face my -ugh- school work... being that it's a Martha Stewart find at the thrift store makes me even happier.

A group of younger girls came over to make some ornaments and decorate gingerbread cookies. This was the first time I can remember doing something like this, a day to just be Christmasy and make stuff. I want to do it again and again!

I haven't bought any Christmas presents. I haven't made any Christmas presents. It's bothering me... yet, I'm not going to write anymore about it until I do something about it.

I hope everyone's preparations have been going well. More importantly though, I hope you are enjoying the brightness, hope, peace and joy of the days of celebration!

John 1

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. 4In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it. The true light that gives light to every man was coming into the world. He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave 

the right to become children of God— children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God.

The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. 

We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, 

who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

Large pictures in this post... uploaded a different way today and hence the change =]

Tagged

I posted "It's the Holiday Season" and had forgotten about this! 

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper.
2. Real tree or Artificial? Christmas trees and I have a history... but that's many other stories. I like real ones because they feel nice.
3. When do you put up the tree? the day after Thanksgiving, or it might have been the day right after that
4. When do you take the tree down? Januaryish
5. Do you like egg nog? I do NOT like eggnog cheesecake. I probably don't like eggnog either.
6. Favorite gift received as a child? oooh. let me think - my pink & black camera comes to mind. I was ecstatic when I received an American Girl doll.
7. Do you have a nativity scene? We have a large one on top of the piano and a few small ones scattered.
8. Hardest person to buy for? My grandparents... friends can be stumping too.
9. Easiest person to buy for? I'm usually quick to decide for my littlest brothers
10. Mail or email Christmas cards? We were just discussing the lower cost of email cards. But there's nothing like seeing the cards all hanging in the doorway!
11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Probably baby pink and blue toe socks... or the Precious Moment's "Round the World" spinning clock.
12. Favorite Christmas movie(s) ? The Nativity Story, The Shop Around the Corner, It's a Wonderful Life
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? ooh depends on the year
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? yes. quilty but not ashamed.
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? cookies cookies cookies! And fruit. Not fruit cake - fruit.
16. Clear or colored Christmas lights? Colored for outdoors. I'm unsure about on the tree... we have colored.
17. Favorite Christmas song(s)? The First Noel, Winter Wonderland, Baby, It's Cold Outside
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? I've never traveled.
19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Dasher, Dancer, Blitzen, Cupid, Prancer, Dixon... Rudolph?
20. Angel on the tree top or a star? star definitely.
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? We've always done Christmas morning for our family. But we visit extended family Christmas Eve and open some anyway
22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? modern Christmas songs instead of classic ones. Weird decorations.
23. Favorite ornament theme or color? what a question! I adore our antique ornaments. I also like simple glass balls. and tinsel!
24. Favorite dinner for Christmas? uuhh Christmas dinner? Okay, okay, a straight answer- turkey, mashed potatoes, pretty similar to Thanksgiving but with twist...
25. What do you want for Christmas this year? Shall I really list them? hmm. Homemade things =] One can never have too many scarves... an abort73 tshirt would rock, an external hard drive, a 1.8 or zoom lens'd be nice (ok, more than nice!) but that's like shooting for a standard height basketball hoop when you're five years old - might happen, but probability's against ya. And one of these have all been on the brain.
26. Do you bake lots of goodies during the holidays? Twice so far - sugar cookies and gingerbread - hopefully more!
27. Do you decorate different rooms of your home? Mainly the living room, abit in the dining room and porch room. The game room mantle also get decorated.
28. What decorations do you put outside? Lights on the house, garland a bow and lights on the lamp post, an old old! plastic nativity set, a plastic snow man, some light up candy canes, candles in the windows and a wreath
29. How do you spend Christmas Eve? With family. Taking photos and eating and playing games.
30. Is Christmas your favorite holiday? hmm. I like the mellowness of Thanksgiving, and the freedom of summer... but Christmas is pretty awesome that's for sure!

one of the first photos taken with my canon last year

Love that Never Fails

"There is no spot in thee." -Song of Solomon 4:7

"Jesus Christ has no quarrel with His spouse. She often wanders from Him, and grieves His Holy Spirit, but He does not allow her faults to affect His love. He sometimes chides, but it is always in the tenderest manner, with the kindest intentions: it is "my love" even then. There is no remembrance of our follies, He does not cherish ill thoughts of us, but He pardons and loves as well after the offence as before it. It is well for us it is so, for if Jesus were as mindful of injuries as we are, how could He commune with us? Many a time a believer will put himself out of humour with the Lord for some slight turn in providence, but our precious Husband knows our silly hearts too well to take any offence at our ill manners."

Dec. 3rd Morning and Evening

O to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be! Let thy goodness, like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee. Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, prone to leave the God I love; here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above.

Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing

Going

By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.
[Hebrews 11:8]

There is a time for departure even when there's no certain place to go.
[Tennessee Williams]

And on that note, I'm sending one of two college applications today!

ET- Feminism Series

credit Empowered Traditionalist

Real life connection: 

Last night at forensics, we were discussing a bill that circled around whether women should be permitted to fight in front lines combat in the armed forces. Most of the girls were citing "women's rights" and "equality" as to why they thought it right. I stood con to the idea, but admitted it was on personal belief and not any legal basis. 

Is it feminine to fight war on  front lines, in the trenches? 

Someone brought up the point: Women are affected by the results of what happens on the front lines. Why not allow them to do something about it by fighting? 

I read the series conclusion today and the term "gender neutrality" jumped out in relation to the discussion last night. 

Watch it here. 

"Everybody wants this ladder..."

God is God

This Sunday afternoon was mellow. My mom and I spent some time together this afternoon. At the gas station, I flipped on the Christian radio station while she was busy filling the tank. The following song was playing. It happens to be a previous favorite; but this afternoon it took on special meaning. More than just a song... a means of seeing a glimpse of an invisible God.

And the pain falls like a curtain
On the things I once called certain
And I have to say the words I fear the most
I just don’t know

And the questions without answers
Come and paralyze the dancer
So I stand here on the stage afraid to move
Afraid to fall, oh, but fall I must
On this truth that my life has been formed from the dust

God is God and I am not
I can only see a part of the picture He’s painting
God is God and I am man
So I’ll never understand it all
For only God is God

And the sky begins to thunder
And I’m filled with awe and wonder
‘Til the only burning question that remains
Is who am I

Can I form a single mountain
Take the stars in hand and count them
Can I even take a breath without God giving it to me
He is first and last before all that has been
Beyond all that will pass

Oh, how great are the riches of His wisdom and knowledge
How unsearchable for
to Him and through Him and from Him
are all things

So let us worship before the throne
Of the One who is worthy of worship alone...

Oh Now Wait a Minute Now

"Hey Noah, keep cool. Hey Noah, I'll take care of the rest, I'm the weatherman."

From WorshipGod 08

The following videos were just posted on the SGM youtube channel. These recitations were a powerful part of the conference for me. To hear scripture orated put life into the words. They're worth watching. I considered posting them one at a time so that the videos would be watched one at a time. Instead I'll just make a suggestion: when you watch them, watch all the way through. Stopping in the middle of the passage, I think you'd miss out.

Psalm 145


Psalm 25


Psalm 22

Guest Post for Forthright Fixation

This post is to let you know that I don't plan to post anything today because you can go read this.
...it's a long one.

Someday I'll Learn

Yesterday we set out to get my driver's learner permit. 
We made sure we had everything needed- forms, payment, ID. 

Driving learner's centers are closed on Mondays.  

So we went again today. They are open on Tuesdays. And everyone knows it- it was 2 pm. The room was filled. 

I didn't know there was a distance vision test... and my glasses were at home in my school tote bag.
I use them during math class to see the chalkboard. 

Third times the charm? 

The boys kept asking, "When are we leaving for your driving lessons? Are we going with you for your driving lesson?"

All this reminds me somehow of Driving Miss Daisy.

Minor News

Yesterday marked a major advance on the getting-my-locker-open front. 

I asked the girl next to me to help me (this was the second time) and took note of what she did and how. In the process I learned her name, that she's a senior, the colleges she's looking at and that she's a cheerleader. I met someone! 

I practiced the combination this morning during the 15 minutes I have when the only people in the building at 6:45  are the janitors and a few devoted teachers. It's taken two and a half weeks, but as of today, I am now able to open my locker.

What minor news that seems in light of all of life right now. School has been like a gigantic wave, pulling me under with its power and sheer volume. But as this week closes, I recognize that God IS faithful. He has calmed the waters, even just a little, so that my head is above, and I am able to take a deep breathe of His grace and peace... whether or not I got a passing grade on my pre-calc test today. 

I'm so grateful to be able to head out tonight to enjoy the company of friends He has gifted me with... at our book study kick-off!

Proverbs 24

If you say, "Behold, we did not know this,"
   does not he who weighs the heart perceive it?
Does not he who keeps watch over your soul know it,
 and will he not repay man according to his work?

My son, eat honey, for it is good,
   and the drippings of the honeycomb are sweet to your taste.
Know that wisdom is such to your soul; 
   if you find it, there will be a future,
   and your hope will not be cut off.

...for the righteous falls seven times and rises again...

Prepare your work outside;
   get everything ready for yourself in the field,
   and after that build your house.

A Strong Branch

“Imagine you are on a high cliff and you lose your footing and begin to fall. Just beside you is a branch sticking out of the edge of the cliff. It is your only hope and seems more than strong enough. How can it save you?

If you’re certain the branch can support you, but you don’t actually reach out and grab it, you are lost. If instead your mind is filled with doubts and uncertainty that the branch can hold you, but you reach out and grab it anyway, you will be saved. Why?

It is not the strength of your faith but the object of your faith that actually saves you. Strong faith in a weak branch is fatally inferior to weak faith in a strong branch.”

—Timothy Keller, The Reason For God (New York, NY: Dutton, 2008), 234

found on FirstImportance.org

Empowered Traditionalist Blog

I just spent a chunk of time browsing here. Real and useful fashion information, challenging questions and Biblical truth are all in abundance. It's now a favorite.

Q: Is Character, intelligence, and personality more important than physical beauty?

A: “There is one that is more in love with you than any man can ever be. You are incredibly valuable to Him, and you never need question His commitment…He thinks you’re beautiful in the morning without your makeup, and He’ll think you’re just as beautiful when you’re 80. He is Christ. There is no need to attract a man to you- Christ will lead the right man to you. And when someone that loves you as much as Christ, arranges a marriage, you may rest assured it will be far better than anything you could have done. You are His-be content there.”

From the Modesty Survey

With God at the center like the sun satisfying a woman’s longing for beauty and greatness, truth and love all the planets of food and dress and exercise, cosmetics, posture and countenance will fall into their proper orbit.

John Piper, The Godward Life

When we look to Him, we put ourselves in proper perspective. As His love, and glory and holiness are magnified in our eyes we suddenly feel so ingsinificant, but we are also feel most at peace. I am most content and most satisfied when all of my selfish motivations are cast aside; and I stand in awe of this glorious King who crushed His Son...because He loved me. Isaiah 53- He bore our sins. Girls Preach the gospel to yourself, proclaim it to your soul!!

Christa Taylor, Empowered Traditionalist blog

Shadowfeet & Albertine

Two songs by Brooke Fraser.





The purpose of this post: I like these videos. I like these songs. I'm sick on the couch with pneumonia and figured, why not, put them on the blog to share! Lots of videos lately... ah well.

WG08 Opening Video

I am so glad this was posted!

It tuned my heart to worship as I sat in my seat the first night of the conference. Watching it again tonight, the way in which it so beautifully pulls together truths from the psalms was just as meaningful.

"If there's one thing to take away from this message it's this:

the psalms are about what your/my life is about."

-David Powlison, Enduring Hardship with the Psalmist

Revolutionary Media + Education

What one thing would I do to change the world if I could?

What will I do about it?

-Christina Dickson for Revolutionary Media 

"Change the World, Today?" @ the Rebelution

I don't have answers to those questions. But I want them... real, and deep. As raw and strong as the emotions and struggles of kids like those pictured in that video- I want my answer, my conviction and my calling to be like that. 

I'm still left with the question: what will I do about it?

Another realization: College isn't just about college. So many people in our culture further their education because its the thing to do, for the sake of not being left behind. Only a percentage have a vision, whether it is a specific field or just a mentality, for an ends by which education should be a means. As Christians, how much more should we pray, should I pray, to obtain an education that God can use.

What kind of impact would it have if we each educated ourselves with the vision of providing with that education change, good, and hope for others?

It's a challenge to move beyond the fulfillment of goals and titles and say to the Lord, "Here I am, use me."

When we think of God as both Creator and Ruler of everything, "we are dealing with a non-human level of dealing with life."

-Craig Cabanis, "Knowing God with the Psalmist"

How about you?

Okay, So now what do I do?

That's just one of the questions I was left with tonight after a ten minute conversation bringing back the reality of school. This summer has been full. The past month has been full. It could have even been alot more so if I had gotten my license by now... that's another story altogether. I've traveled several times, growing in decision-making, common sense, and wisdom in what it means to function well as a group and an individual apart of a said group. I am being challenged to see my family and home as a true training ground in responsibility, serving, diligence and having a joyful heart. My parents and I have grown closer through conversations in which they help me to see my sin and turn toward God; to trust Him in the circumstances I've been in. He's been at work.

That aforementioned conversation, which centered around the application process for colleges, has me thinking. Three years ago, I dreamed of attending an Ivy League school and was, if not already on that track, ready to put myself there- long, grueling hours, days completely full of schoolwork, dedication and excellence, or rather, excellence by my own perception and definition. Between then and now a story has unfolded.

Sophomore year was marked by falling asleep in my beanbag chair while reading biology or world history; I was sick with mono and I had no control or choice. I rearranged my bedroom to be able to do school and watch movies all from my bed. I saw Fiddler on the Roof for the first time during those months! God's grace shone as I completed four semesters of work in three. He showed me that it can be just as gratifying and beautiful to complete a requirement as to go beyond it.

Junior year is the hardest academically; senior year is the hardest emotionally.
Or so I'd heard. I still find myself analyzing that statement and rummaging through my mind to try to determine whether I'd say my life has agreed with that common generalization. Academically, wasn't my best. I had achievements... I got through APUSH. History and English/writing were solid core courses. Bible, volunteering and other electives were numerous. Amid that, it seems I didn't get all I needed and balance was lacking. Chemistry labs and Spanish were shady. But the Lord knows, and there lies my trust. Truth is truth, despite any fears. Emotionally- wow. We moved. I'd dreaded that event for my whole preteen and teen life. My childhood is over. We left the place where it happened; its memory. For the sake of honesty and reality, yes it would be memory still if we hadn't moved...

I held great plans for my schoolwork this summer; it was to be a launching point. None of them have happened yet. Not a single study book for the SAT or ACT test has been opened let alone registered for. Only two colleges have been visited. I have no idea how to write an application essay. I still have no solid idea for a senior project let alone any work done on one. The home economics course I finally sought to do has only sort of panned out. No garden, and a little reading. A desire to cook has emerged that I'd never really had, lots of cleaning has been done and much general care given as Mom's been sick. Faith is having hope for what one doesn't see... I don't see much; but God makes something out of nothing everyday.

Disclaimer: I would delve into the ways that this summer produced great things, despite my "great plans" not coming about... but that would take me into numerous other directions from where this thought train is heading. So. Ask, and sure, I will gladly tell some stories of the beautiful and lovely things that have come my way!

An underlying realization- I don't know what I am supposed to do. For months, I've been in a state of holding unanswered questions. Oh God has been good. He's shown me I truly am His chosen daughter. I am free from condemnation from sin; and do not need to fear making mistakes. I need not seek man's approval but rather if I shall open my heart to my Abba, Father and just be His, according to the glorious calling He has given me, all will be well. He is truly my best friend and only through His love for me do I love Him or anyone else. I spent last week being refreshed and anchored by truth and God's presence. "...and all my questions that are unresolved don’t change the wisdom of Your will..." -Out of the Depths Light is just starting to shine in this area. Every season has its purpose. 

He ordained that ten-minute conversation just as He has ordained my occupation with other areas of life outside of education the past few months. There is a reason I haven't thought of it and that I am thinking of it now. God is in control of time.

He's molding me, into what I don't know, but is that knowledge something I need?

Is not the process of creation just as beautiful, meaningful and adventurously challenging if not more than any finished piece of art?

On Femininity [mostly]

" We may be fallen, but we are redeemed by the good Savior to glorify Him and fulfill His purposes.

_____
Woman was that helper made just for man, and the Lord blessed them and called it very good. Man was ultimately given the leadership of their union and the responsibility for creation. Woman was made to be his helper. When they sinned, Adam, not Eve, was the one God first addressed and called to account for their disobedience. Adam, not Eve was held responsible. Biblical femininity follows this precedent set in Eden—women are made to follow, to submit, to nurture, to affirm and to receive. Men are the leaders, the initiators, the protectors and the providers.
_____
Men and women were designed to work together as in a dance, complimenting each other with joy and equally partners in the dance.
_____
God has designed us to desire these things [to be beautiful, to love and be loved], and through His Son’s redeeming work on our behalf, we have access to the joy of seeing these good desires
fulfilled in Him. "

Treasures

I find myself praying often for God to lead me throughout my day.
Decisions big, small, hard.

To be led, one has to walk. 

By faith and in His faithfulness we walk, not by sight. 
It's not necessarily easy or comfortable-- exercise. 
But it can be and is meant to be peaceful and joyful.

Though I cannot see clearly, I believe and hold His truths as true. 
"He will never deceive me." - Whatever My God Ordains is Right

He is the author and perfector of all--
the faith we receive from and through Him, of our days, decisions and lives.

"But Mary treasured these things, pondering them in her heart." 

Luke 2:19

 

Hymn

If to distant lands I scatter
If I sail to farthest seas
Would you find and firm and gather 'til I only dwell in Thee?
If I flee from greenest pastures
Would you leave to look for me?
Forfeit glory to come after
'Til I only dwell in Thee

If my heart has one ambition
If my soul one goal to seek
This my solitary vision 'til I only dwell in Thee
That I only dwell in Thee
'Til I only dwell in Thee

Today this has been playing on repeat... all day. 
What a beautiful piece of music! The fact that it is so much more than just music because of the truth and perspective it contains only adds to its beauty.

By Brooke Fraser

Simplicity

is the definition of my posting of late.
Writing stories and posts about life will return... but this is now.

"I’ve got to fling myself upon His truth and promises and wait for His will with the utterly abandoned delight of a small child trusting the good purposes of a parent to bless them." [Unconformed]

God has and is using Proverbs 3 so heavily in my life this year. Reading that scripture in that post brought a moment of sitting in contented awe with God. That He reminds me of His presence in my life and cares for my soul through continuing to remind me of such truth in simple, real life, understanding who I am ways- no words.

Imagine That

what an original cake.
lime at that.
plus a groom's cake, which is also unique.

and make sure to note the silver stands they're resting on.

should you decide to follow the link, you'll be taken to a blog post which is hosted on a photography blog that I thoroughly enjoy keeping up with. it's a fave. 

Romans 8

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature...

 Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.

 You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.

Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation—but it is not to the sinful nature, to live according to it. For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

 Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us... And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.

 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

 What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Why just post scripture? 

Because it is truth; and tonight, I cannot think of a better way to communicate what is going on in life right now. We have been called according to His purpose. We are justified and He is at the throne interceding for us. There is hope! In many ways, I do not know the purpose of my life. I am unsure of how to pray and what to pray for. To what have I been called? What do I need to let go of in order to deeply pursue that calling? Numerous questions and a vast amount of sin remains, but how great is the Savior! God is at work. His Word is truth. He is for me, and I am with Him. 

Each time I read over Romans 8 I see something new. 

Go ahead, read it again... seek out a treasure of your own. 

Completion & Preparation

Tomorrow: high school evaluation, long awaited and well-planned for. I'm ready. Math wasn't fabulous and chemistry could have been better; but hey, music and drama is pretty nice and honors English is great... and I survived APUSH. I didn't flunk! I learned much this year; and this week I've still been absorbing the lessons as I look back over everything and see it come to an end. 

YOUTH CAMP.

I love camp. 

It's neat to be saying that going into camp, instead of while coming away as I did last year. 

God is working in my heart. I am SO excited and that excitement is increasing each day. My stomach starts fluttering and I become speechless when I really delve into the emotions surrounding this part of the summer. I desire to meet God and am expectant that He will be there because He's already here, now, today, yesterday, Sunday. 

The supremacy of Christ is becoming evident in my life through situations, responses and conversations. I am waiting and hoping that God expands on the power found in that concept at camp. 

One more reason for excitement: A girl from our softball team is coming to camp! An uncanny and relaxed conversation led to an invitation which turned into action. God is just too cool.

Moving Forward in Truth

I don't think a goodbye or the time leading up to it could be any sweeter than that I have recently seen and been a part of.

My Lebanese, jelly bean sharing, adventurous & infectiously joyful friend- if you're reading this, know that the times I've throughout the spent with you in the past few weeks, I clearly saw God in our conversations. I had such fun! I'll treasure the memories always. Looking forward to lots of stories (praying for testimonies of salvation!) and the next time I get to give you a hug.

I didn't intend to post on the above, but I couldn't not say something about it.

...every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. John 15: 2-5

Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

1. O soul, are you weary and troubled?
   No light in the darkness you see?
   There’s light for a look at the Savior,
   And life more abundant and free!
   • Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
     Look full in His wonderful face,
     And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
     In the light of His glory and grace.
2. Through death into life everlasting
   He passed, and we follow Him there;
   O’er us sin no more hath dominion—
   For more than conquerors we are!
3. His Word shall not fail you—He promised;
   Believe Him, and all will be well:
   Then go to a world that is dying,
   His perfect salvation to tell!
4. Even when we don't feel as close to God as we desire to feel, He is near. I heard someone very wise say that when you feel as if you couldn't possibly hold on any longer, look and see that He is holding on to you. God is working in me as I work to finish this school year. During conversation yesterday I was able to recognize His grace. I haven't been consumed by schoolwork as is my nature, but have been able to enjoy the weather and go through days of work more freely. Separate from and more prevalent than schoolwork: God is working on my heart spiritually and I recognize it. At times the recognition happens awkwardly; I am sure, always incompletely, but it's there.
5. 
   

Elliot

Project Ideas & Gratitude

New thought on the school front: What should I do for a senior project?

The few people I've asked this week responded with "What are your guidelines?" and the word "fundraising" came up a few times. I'm honestly quite content with having fundraised for the pregnancy center (and hopefully again next year) and though volunteering is a possibility, I've got a good amount going in that realm already through church-related activities. Being home-schooled, there are no guidelines, at least I don't think there should be.

An extended photography project or collection was immediately what came to mind; but I'm still thinking. 

God has been providing conversations lately with folks who have experience and a Biblical viewpoint on different majors or schools I have interest in. To hear information from a source other than a website, book or college-sponsored event is priceless. Each person has been apart of guess what- the local church. I know my parents are grateful and so am I. 
Thanks Lord!

Looking at Our House

We were in the neighborhood having visited Dad's parents after lunch and then stopped quickly to grab & give a hug to dad's brother and our cousin.

"Hey Dad, go past the house."
"Okay, but nobody get weird or anything."
"We've got to stop and see them [the neighbors]. They've got to be home. Let's surprise them!" said Mum.

It was a lovely, lovely visit. Our families hadn't seen each other since the tearful night before and actual November moving day.  Just to talk and laugh, we always do! To be someplace completely familiar, in a house that I've been familiar with since I could walk and even before, to be with people who were so much like family and always right next door. The words sweet and precious come to mind. We actually opened our Christmas presents... Many dates had been set to get together, but it hadn't happened. There we were today and there the presents had been for months. Theirs are still in our dining room. 

This is the point of the story where a slight correction is needed. The post title should read: Looking at what was our house... felt really, really odd. Mum & Dad admitted the same. We'd driven past at Thanksgiving then Christmas and seen it barren of decorations, but today was different. We were outside of the car, walking around, up to our neighbors house. Everything seemed more personal. I had an urge several times to just go over, run in the yard, swing open the shed or walk up the front steps. I even wanted to go up to the door, ring the bell and just say, "I used to live here. Yay! How do you like it? 'cause I loved it completely." My parents joked the reply would be, "And...so...what?"

I wanted to do what I'd done everyday since I was born; but I didn't. I couldn't. None of it was mine anymore. In fact, some of it was even gone. Our hand prints and names were all in the cement holding down the blue, green and white striped swing set. They had taken it down- no kids. The red chinese maple with our names carved in it was huge. I used to sit under that tree for hours, talking to myself, dreaming and playing with rocks, flowers, grass, sticks, reading books. One of my dad's business signs was hidden under the lattice of the steps. I wonder why he left it... 

I wonder if they noticed any of the things we left behind: the writing in the crawl spaces, did they read the gospel verse?! The above mentioned hand-prints and carvings, the windows cut into the side of the shed from when it was our playhouse, the height markings on the basement closet doorway, the footprints pressed in the garage floor. The footprints weren't ours, but we always liked them. I know the holes from our homemade basketball hoop have to still be in the brick of the house on the deck... but they'll never see them. Of course, who would? Yet, I know they're there. That house has us all over it. My dad did so much work... and it was all beautiful. I'm not sure if I appreciated or saw it before, maybe. I know I did today.

There was a plastic duck on the porch. A plastic duck... oh my. Plastic ducks (you know, the kind that can be dressed for any and all seasons) aren't, well, I just never imagined a plastic duck sitting on that front porch. I know, they're kitsch... but not in a good way for me. They're not bad, just make me wince then laugh. Kevin thought of all kinds of funny things they could have done to the inside, and some not so funny things actually. I laughed at them all when he was talking though.

Hopefully the members of the family who owned the house we bought will drive by. But I want them to come in, say hello, to say as I wanted to say this afternoon, "I lived here. I loved this house. It meant something to me and was part of my life. Here's why..." To play a record on the turntable even! A house is just a house; but still, some houses are homes. This is now our home, but it was someone else's too. That seems to mean something in my mind. It just doesn't seem right not to know who lived here and what these rooms meant to them; or for the people with the plastic duck not to know who we were/are. It could be that I'm asking for too much information and I really don't want to know all that... possibly.

Moving is something I'll remember as a part of the transition from being a kid to a young adult/teenager. I feel like today was a "growing up" day. I couldn't change the fact that the old house now belonged to someone else*, someone I don't know, or that they most likely would never know about me, my family or the consequential moments for us at that very address. The moments remain; the location has changed. Reality wasn't harsh but was firm, kinda stark, yet sprinkled with joy. 

It's life.

As I wrote on the rafters:

The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord." -Job 1:21

& guess what - the Lord gave again and continues to give. 

*The flip-side is that we now have a wonderful new house which is appreciated and loved!

A Little More Music

This played on one of my favorite mixed CDs as we drove home from my softball game tonight, which we won 5-4. Three of us did the wave a bunch of times while playing "left bench" for an inning. f-u-n.

This week could have been horrible, grueling and painful. It hasn't been, and I can't post without acknowledging that God has been continually showing Himself present whether through Sunday at church, beautiful natural surroundings, songs, or scripture. It's been hard, prayerful & tearful. It's not near over, but God is good.

You’re in too deep...
He hasn’t left you out to dry
Even Now
You haven’t left His watching eye
Even Now
So children sing it when you don’t see how
My Father’s worthy of my hope
Even now

You’re wondering if you heard Him wrong
If he’s listening

The same old fear, the same old haze
Is God not here?
Is His hand raised?

Could this be part of any good plan?

When your tunnel’s still dark at the end
Even Now
His children don’t know why but trust their Father’s at their side
So hold His hand, hold up your hope
Even now

The Consequences of Love

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.

1 John 4

Beloved, we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is. And everyone who thus hopes in him purifies himself as he is pure... for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything. 

1 John 3

Your mercies crown our lives all our days

River of Life quench our thirsty souls

For no true delight does Your love withhold

And in every season

We are satisfied for just one reason

Christ was crucified

Through the Precious Blood, Come Weary Saints

Duos Cancion

These selections are totally different from each other, but are two recent favorites & worth sharing. The parents are also currently enjoying the first. Just last night Dad really connected with it in what he said turned out to be a momentous night of being close to God. 

Mercy Me, Word of God Speak

lyrics listen  

Emily Jane White, Time on Your Side

small disclaimer: If you come across something odd or weird related to this 

indie artist, even other songs of hers, as of this posting, my knowledge extends no further than having enjoyed this particular song. I'm not really understanding the design of the album cover artwork.

lyrics personal site 

Note: itunes can give away some really icky free songs, but also some great ones. Time on Your Side was the latter in my opinion.

Completion

The week of the paper has gone. I survived. 

It's looooong. 

Alot of people have trouble writing enough words to meet a requirement. I deal with the opposite--writing too many--and it truly isn't any better of a situation. It's not a masterpiece and I could definitely use a teacher's help in proofing it sometime. I like it though and am thankful for the grace I can see poured out over every page written.

Race and the Gospel

A Favorite Blog- Go Read It!

Some recent posts:

• On the topic of evangelism. 
  
• This post down to the very scriptures fits right in with who and where I have been for the past months and still am, I think. 
  

photo credit The Rebelution & Forthright Fixation

Chinese Rice. The Kennedys & One Precious 'I love You'

I had a slight skip in my walk and I was humming around the kitchen from the refrigerator to counter to the other counter space. Rice left over from chinese takeout two night ago went right into the microwave, set for 1 minute. Thoughts during the above procession included calculating how much of my first draft I had left to type out, how many hours it would take me, whether I might be able to go to softball practice and oh, ya, how am I going to fit in the math test I have to take? Amazing how rapidly the brain travels from one thing to the next. I peered around the cabinets and through the window of the kitchen and back room- hey it's spring out there! I could see that irresistable sunshine that I knew I had to resist. Soon enough... summer.

I remembered a friend recently remembering how in elementary school she would be finished with schoolwork at 11am and go "trampling" and exploring outside all day. "It was like two and a half years of vacation." Hmm. Ya, those years were great for me too- all the field trips, we went everywhere. All the art projects- art was transcendent throughout every other subject. Oh those projects where we painted to classical music... The littlest came out of the bedroom and with that same skip in his step I had moments before, came into the kitchen. "Hey, did you guys buy that outfit (new swimming trunks and a surf shirt) yesterday?" I got a huge hug and heard, "I love you. I love you so much." 

The moment passed. The microwave had gone off in the midst of it and so I got out my rice and headed back to my laptop and paper on the Kennedy family. 

Homeschooling's my thing. And all the why in the world is in this story.

Delay no Longer

Every blossoming flower warns you that it is time to seek the Lord; be not out of tune with nature, but let your heart bud and bloom with holy desires. Do you tell me that the warm blood of youth leaps in your veins? I entreat you, give your vigour to the Lord. It was my unspeakable happiness to be called in early youth, and I could fain praise the Lord every day for it. Salvation is priceless... but oh! an early salvation has a double value in it. Young men and maidens, since you may perish ere you reach your prime, "It is time to seek the Lord." ...Let me entreat and implore you to delay no longer. "It is time to seek the Lord." ...Slight not that work, it may be your last call from destruction, the final syllable from your lips.

- Charles Spurgeon 

Sow for yourselves righteousness, reap the fruit of unfailing love, and break up your unplowed ground; for it is time to seek the Lord, until he comes and showers righteousness upon you. 

-Hosea 10:12

Amy Carmichael on Prayer

The following is taken from Amy Carmichael: A Life Abandoned to God.

1. Don't get into bondage about place, or position of the body... sometimes, at least, [Our Lord] went into the open air to a hillside; to a garden... I have known some who could kneel hours by a chair, some walking up and down. Some go into their rooms and shut the door... Let the leaning of your mind lead you, a God-directed mind leans to what helps the spirit most. 
2. Don't be discouraged if at first you seem to get nowhwere... no command in the Bible [is] so difficult as to obey and so penetrating in power... [as] "Be still and know that I am God." Many have found this so... 
3. Dont feel it is necessary to pray all the time; listen... and read the Words of Life. Let them enter into you.
4. Dont forget there is one other person interested in you-- extremely interested... there is no truer word than the old couplet: Satan trembles when he sees The weakest saint upon his knees. 
5. Dont give up in despair if no thoughts and no words come, but only distractions and inward confusions. Often it helps to use the words of others...Psalm, hymn, song-- use what helps most.
6. Dont worry if you fall asleep. "He giveth unto His beloved in sleep."
7. And if the day ends in what seems failure, don't fret. Tell Him you're sorry. Even so, don't be discouraged. All discouragement is of the devil.

• We don't need to explain to our Father things that are known to Him.
• We don't need to press Him, as if we had to deal with an unwilling God.
• We don't need to suggest to Him what to do, for he Himself knows what to do.

"She noted 'the gates of access into the Father's presence are open continually. There is no need to push-- perhaps 'trying to pray' is sometimes a sort of pushing."

"There are many in our family who come to prayer meetings because it is the custom to do so, but who are not urged by a great desire. It is the lack of prayer-hunger that often makes a big united meeting difficult."

Do I have a "hunger" to pray? 

To come together with others to pray?

There were two separate instances in the book that stood out on pages near the above instructions of time set apart for prayer: "For two hours they prayed and sang--two minutes it seemed to Amy-- before a messenger came to tell them the result of the operation. ...The council requested three solid hours of prayer [for Amy's health to improve] by the Fellowship."

"Have we any prayer like 'use me, O Lord' in the Bible?... [No] I could not find any such prayer...[I] find every other verb occurring in prayer-- teach me, lead me, bless me, and so on-- but not this verb which we would naturally expect... The Captain will use the soldier if he be prepared for use; words of beseeching on the soldier's part are not required..."